It's the month of October so everyone and their mother has to post about how they can start wearing knee high boots now on Facebook. The cruel fate of Emalie and I is that we live in the miserably hot Florida, but God's grace smiled on us and we have been having a few weeks of marvelous cool weather! But I digress. Lately I've slipped into a state of horror movie obsession. Usually, I'm terrified of horror movies. I can't go to sleep without checking the shower fifty times and making sure that Michael Myers isn't lurking in the shadows of my cluttered and cramped closet waiting for me to close my eyes. Oddly enough, I've actually turned into somewhat of a horror movie buff. I've been watching countless amounts of gore and hot murderers just run rampant. It's slightly absurd but I just cower in the corner, blanket in hand (sometimes over head) and watch as beautiful bombshells get chased around, screaming their heads off while I uselessly bark commands at them like "TAKE OFF YOUR PUMPS AND THEN RUN! JIMMY CHOO WASN'T KNOWN FOR MAKING RUNNING GEAR!" Despite my attempts at helping them successfully escape an inevitable fate, they still fall to their own demise. So I've compiled a small list of horror movie babes who were ill-fated and didn't make it out alive.

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5. Marion Crane - Psycho (1960)
In the infamous cult classic Psycho, the drop dead gorgeous Janet Leigh plays Marion Crane, the woman who takes off with $40,000 and unfortunately checks into the Bates Motel. This is the place of her death as she is stabbed to death in the shower by the mysterious figure. During the vast majority of her screen time, I was mostly marveling at her eyebrows and lip color that managed to stay on during her death. I must learn her tips for her thick eyebrows and long-lasting lipstick. If it can last through a shower massacre, then it must be good.

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4. Pam - Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
Pam, although sometimes came off as really complainy, was easily one of my favorite characters, or at least one of my favorite victims in TCM. Pam, played by Teri McMinn, is now, more popularly called "Meat Hook girl" because of the somewhat comedic cause of death. True to the "slaughterhouse" feel, Leatherface catches Pam in the hallway while she desperately searches for her boyfriend Kirk (with that hardly buttoned, denim shirt and bushy chest hair, Kirk was a 70's dreamboat) and is swept off her feet by Leatherface instead of her knight in shining chest hair. While kicking and screaming, the Leatherfaced foe simply slips Pam's back on sharp metal hook while he dismembers Kirk right in front of her. After she is faced with agonizing pain and suffering, he leaves her in the freezer to die a slow death. 

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3. Annie Strode - Halloween (1978)
One of the two friends that you see in Halloween is Annie. Annie, played by Nancy Loomis, is the queen of plaid and curly locks in the movie and proved that bell-bottoms really were all the rage in the 70s. Annie is automatically marked a doomed women when she's on the phone while she's alone in her house. Everyone knows that telephones are a psychological sign of death in horror movies. Annie's death though is kind of harsh. Girl is stalked by the infamous Michael and finally is choked in her car (which is stunning by the way) when Michael pops out of the backseat. Just when she thinks her night can't get any worse, Michael decides to finish her off by slitting her throat! What a groovy way to go. Not to mention that this slasher film stunner has her poor limp and lifeless body moved and set up in front of a tombstone that read,"Our beloved daughter Judith Myers" JUDITH DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE, MICHAEL. SHE DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE. 

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 2. Mrs. Lovett - Sweeney Todd: Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)
Okay, so this one is probably a little (a lot) biased. I'm kind of in love with Sweeney Todd. Emalie and I watched this movie probably too many times, we know every song, every character, we even assigned singing parts for when we make ourselves spring into musical form. Anyway, my blog, my list. Regardless, Mrs. Lovett, played by the beautiful Helena Bonham Carter, is the hopeless meat pie shop owner who is hopelessly in love with Mr. Todd (Johnny Depp in pinstripe slacks and a bloody leather coat, who wouldn't swoon?) and lies to "protect" him. Unfortunately, this is her downfall. When Mr. Todd catches wind that she fed him a bunch of crap when he asked about the whereabouts of his ex-wife, so he accidentally slit her throat. Upon finding out what Mrs. Lovett caused, he acted in the only suitable way; dancing with her and jumping into song. They two lovingly pranced about until Mr. Todd skillfully tossed her into the furnace where she burned to a screaming crisp. It's not her fault though, she would do anything to be with him. Even help with the murders of several men and a woman or two. Now that's love.  


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 1. Casey Becker - Scream (1996)
Okay, I chose Casey Becker, played by Drew Barrymore, from Scream for obvious reasons. Number one: Drew Berrymore is gorgeous and so was Casey. There is no way that you didn't cry for the beauty of that girl when she was slaughtered. Number two: because this is one of my biggest fears in ways of dying. It's all fun and games until the prank caller turns out to be a murderer! Poor Casey simply planned on having a fun night, watching horror movies and gossiping when she gets a call from a person she doesn't recognize. He asks her a question and says if she doesn't get it right, he'll kill her boyfriend. Sidebar: If someone was joking to this degree with me, I would instantly grab all the possible weaponry around my house and prepare for a completely terrifying night. Anyways, she guesses wrong and her boyfriend is gutted by the prank caller. She instantly freaks out when she begins to realize that this is all too real and then the night of her death becomes immanent. Ghostface breaks into her house where he chases her until she breaks out and makes it onto the front lawn where her parents, thank god, pull up. Just like several other people, I thought it was all over until the masked man pulls her down and stabs her in the stomach. The worst part is that she can't even scream or cry for help so her parents don't even see their bloodied daughter in the freaking garden. After a few minutes of struggling, she gets stabbed several more times and as the grand finale, Ghosface strings her up in a tree where she hangs by her entrails. Talk about a gut feeling. Okay I'm sorry for that. Sidebar: Can we talk about how beautiful Billy Loomis is? I'm sorry, I know he's a murderer and everything but man, what a stud. 
  

Horror Movie Hunnies

Posted on

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

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